2013/02/21

Chapter 38: The Three Kinds of People in this World

CHRISTMAS VACATION: CONFESSIONS OF A CONFUSED DOUCHE


SECTION FOUR: ASHEVILLE, NORTH CAROLINA





Chapter XXXVIII: The Three Kinds of People in this World





The bus was scheduled to leave at 9:00 PM and in Lorenzo Law like fashion, I made sure I was there on time. Actually, the only way the bus schedule ran ensured I would be there over an hour early. There was no way that I was going to walk a great distance carrying all of my stuff.

As I was standing at the bus stop, Mary was on the porch smoking and somebody else approached the bus stop. According to some people, this dude would be considered sketchy looking simply because he was big, black, and dressed in hip hop apparel (AKA- Thug Gear). This was the type of situation we were discussing the previous night, and Kelly somewhat assumed that too many people in this neighborhood had bad intentions. Mary, on the other hand, felt otherwise… as did I.

I initiated the conversation with this human being, and we talked and laughed about all sorts of stuff while waiting for the bus. We also sat next to each on the bus and continued our conversation. I think people need to redefine what they consider sketchy. Plus, he planned to buy stock in the Green Bay Packers because they were his favorite team.

During my wait at the Greyhound Station, I did nothing but stand around and smoke cigarettes. The bus was running late, and I had spent some portion of the time worrying that I would miss the bus. Also, I noticed that my trip had several layovers throughout the night: Knoxville, Nashville, Louisville, Indianapolis, Chicago, and finally Milwaukee. Leaving from Asheville, that was four mother fucking ‘villes that I had to visit in one night.

Bus drama began almost immediately. One bus arrived and somebody had boarded the wrong bus by accident. He thought he was heading to Savannah, GA, but instead found himself stranded in Asheville, NC. After a series of bickering back and forth with the bus driver, who insisted that his route was finished and that he could board the next bus to Savannah in the morning, the passenger simply got back on the bus and sat down. The driver told the dispatcher at this station to call the police on this person.

I felt bad for the guy. Those of us standing outside awaiting the bus to Knoxville theorized what exactly happened—and we were right. He was on this bus, and when it came time to transfer, he boarded the same bus thinking that that was what he was supposed to do. I viewed this as a simple mistake.

When the police were called, somebody said, “Oh, he’s going to have a place to stay tonight now… jail.”

Another said, “The police in this town don’t play.”

That’s when I grew irritated—and I hadn't even departed yet. I didn't want him to go to jail, and I was hoping that he would be let go; the other people insisted he should get arrested. Others joined in, and it was as if they were hoping he would be arrested and be dealt the type of sentencing that left a permanent blemish on life's record and virtually impossible to seek any sort of improvement or career change.

To my right, were all black people, all white people to my left… me in the middle. I heard the words of Baby Huey enter my head: “There are three types of people in this world; there’s black people, there’s white people, and then there’s my people.” At that moment, I was all alone.

Problem #1: The guy considered such a problem that required police intervention was black. The person who made the aforementioned "jail" comment was also black. There are already too many people in jail for too small of crimes. This person only made a simple mistake but reacted inappropriately—he was not a criminal. Furthermore, the common complaint in society (and one that I thoroughly agree with) is that too many black people are victims of injustice and too easily placed under arrest whereas many others would be dealt mercy. To me, it was a travesty that all these black people were rooting for this person to be arrested. That spoke volumes to me.

Problem #2: The white guy who insisted that the cops in this town “don’t play,” never even lived in Asheville. In actuality, it’s the opposite, as cops here are lenient. I told him that, and there was just a “we’ll see about that” attitude.

Cops in this town "Don't Play"
The cops arrived, boarded the bus, and soon re-emerged with the guy in question; they were talking and laughing together... playing, like the cops around here frequently do. There were no arrests made; meaning, I was right and this other guy was simply blurting out random clich├ęs in which he knew nothing about. Instead of arresting him, they gave him directions to Waffle House and informed him a list of things he could do downtown—told him of all the hotels.

I pulled him aside, told him not to sweat anything, that Asheville was among the coolest places on Earth, and I informed him of all the perks. If he needed money for the bus, he could simply go downtown and bum change from random strangers stating that he needed bus fare—that 29% of the population would be doing the exact same thing; if he needed money for a hotel, he could simply walk up and down South French Broad selling crack; and if he played his cards right, he wouldn't need a hotel for he could find himself a sugar mama—though she might have a tremendous cock significantly larger than his. He was married. What a boring mother fucker! I’d have taken his ass to jail for that stupid comment.

After all was said and done, everybody was happy and the dispatcher set him up with a ticket to Knoxville and they could go from there—this away he would not be stuck outside all night (apparently, he did not have enough money on him to book a hotel.)

Then I had to listen to these other people, none who were Asheville residents, talk of other places in the south where he would have been arrested. He was lucky he wasn’t in Mobile, Alabama. The conversation also switched to guns, where the folks from Tennessee were discussing how they got their old lady a pistol for Christmas. This other dude explained the proper way to turn a semi-automatic assault rifle into a fully automatic. I figured that was good information to know for if I ever needed to defend myself against an entire city mall.


Index: Chapter List

Chapter 38 Soundtrack Listing:


1. Baby Huey
"A Change Is Going To Come" 9:26

The Baby Huey Story
1971

2. Sly & the Family Stone
"Everyday People" 2:22

Stand!
1969

3. Neil Michael Hagerty
"Creature Catcher" 2:28

Neil Michael Hagerty
2001

4. Vue
"Look Out for Traffic" 3:25

Babies Are For Petting
2003

5. Ladyhawk
"Night You're Beautiful" 3:03

Shots
2008

6. Sex Church
"Beneath the Bottom" 5:31

Growing Over
2011

7. N.W.A.
"Straight Outta Compton" 4:21

Straight Outta Compton
1988

8. Dead Cops
"Kill the Cops" 2:37

Kill the Cops
1984

9. Nazareth
"Please Don't Judas Me" 9:48

Hair Of The Dog
1975

10. Dan Deacon
"Wham City" 12:12

Spiderman of the Rings
2007

All Sections Written, Designed, and Music Compiled by Tony J. Neal

Cops playing video games image shared from: Wacky Owl
Three Kinds of People in this World referenced from A Change is Gonna Come by Baby Huey
©2013

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