2011/10/19

NC17 Top 175 Traxxx of 2002

The Top 200 Songs of 2002 + Making the Best of Bad Situations
Part 1: Petty Concerns
Part 2: Once Disgusted, Take Control
Part 3: Break-ups
Part 4: Go...Far... Believe in Yourself
Part 5: PBHD: Post Break-up Hope Disorder
Part 6: Various Causes and Effects of Fond Memories
Part 7: Unnatural States of Disillusionment
Part 8: The Beast

Part II: Once Disgusted, Take Control


Press play to hear all of these songs in order.



175. Ben Kweller
"How it Should Be (Sha Sha)" 1:49
Sha Sha
San Francisco, CA/New York, NY

Today, the people decided they were going to take command and live their lives however they wished. This meant numerous changes were soon to come forth. Those who did not like their jobs, did not show up work, and showed up for work elsewhere.

174. Sleater Kinney
"Oh!" 3:56
One Beat
Olympia, WA

Walter woke up in an extremely good mood that day; he quit his job, left his wife, and embarked on an incredible journey with his new found friend...Randy the aardvark.

173. Boards of Canada
"Julie and Candy" 5:30
Geogaddi
Edinburg, UK

The roaring crash could be heard all across town. For reasons that should be obvious, during a nationally televised event that had been dubbed "important viewing" everybody in town threw their television sets out the window and set new standards as to what was genuinely important.

172. The Coral
"Skeleton Key" 3:03
S/T
Hoylake, England

Ever since the meeting with the old woman who claimed she could conjure demons, peculiar things began happening around the house... in particular with the household Swiffer.

171. Abilene
"Blanc Fixe" 5:39
Two Guns, Twin Arrows
Chicago, IL

Anytime Tex rolled in to town with his posse of renegade midgets, trouble is sure to follow. Things got ugly when a grocery store manager threatened to have their horses towed for parking in the store's fire lane. Tex said cooly, "if there's a fire, we'll move. Shit, we'll even put it out." The manager said a few harsh words, a Tex backhanded him. Meanwhile, the renegade midgets went down to the toilet paper aisle and lit all of the family sized packages of toilet paper on fire... as well as all the other flammable merchandise. There was a fire all right, Tex insisted, and holding true to his promise, they moved.

170. The Mountain Goats
"The Mess Inside" 3:35
All Hail West Texas
Clermont, CA

Franklin and Abigail despised cleaning their house, so they didn't. And for whatever reason, their relationship had been on the brink of demise. They tried to fix it, but nothing ever seemed to work. Then, they tried cleaning their house, but that didn't work either. After several hours of their definition of intense cleaning (consisting of kneeling in the kitchen, pounding cockroaches that crawl from underneath the sink with a shoe), the place was still filthy. So was their relationship. They paid some midgets to torch the house and went their seperate ways.

169. Norah Jones
"Don't Know Why" 3:06
Come Away With Me
New York, NY

Every single year, at Christmas time, Aunt Margaret would observe those around her with a smile. She thought of all those memories, recollecting all those years that had gone by, some of the bullshit Christmas presents she got little Scotty 6 years ago- gets him the same shit every year. This mother fucker's like 47 years old now, and God damn Aunt Margaret is still buying this little asshole toy dump trucks for Christmas. It's probably about time to start considering putting Aunt Margaret in a retirement community- hopefully next year they will get a nice gift certificate for a nursing home.
168. Beck
"The Golden Age"
Sea Change
Los Angeles, CA

Thinking about the times he had while he owned that one car made him feel somber. He had a lot of good times in that car. In fact, that particular period in his life is defined as the era in which he owned that automobile- the VW Rabbit Era. The VW Rabbit Era came to an end as a result of a faulty head casket. As he pulled into the filling station with smoke pouring from underneath the hood, he knew the wonderful times had reached its climax. He wondered if Beverly would still love him, after all, most women only date men who drive VW Rabbits. He was never the same with the bus pass. And Beverly, she ended up catching liver cancer...he wondered if the head gasket had caused that too.

167. Dave Holland Big Band
"Blues For C.M." 9:05
What Goes Around
Wolverhampton, UK/New York, NY

Bored with what was being served every night from the George Foreman Grill, little Joey, age 9, decided he wasn't eating this shit anymore. "I ain't eatin' this shit," he said.

166. The Jim Yoshii Pile-Up
"Lines Drawn"  3:44
Homemade Drugs
Oakland, CA

Todd loved Debbie so much that he often said mean, hurtful things to her because he did not know how to handle to overwhelming sense of love. Eventually, Debbie stomped all of his teeth in and had an affair with some bloke who looked like Ricky Ricardo. To win back her love, Todd sent Debbie a romantic card that stated: "listen here you fucking whore, go ahead and date that other cockhead, I don't need your bullshit anyway." A couple of weeks after that, Debbie returned her romance, and sent Todd a package. When Todd opened the package containing the mail bomb, well, sadly, he passed away.

165. Oxes
"Your Street is Wall Street" 5:11
Oxxxes
Baltimore, MD

Tired of seeing this pair of rollerblades setting in the foyer, Reynalds, apartment 4, left this note on the front door:  "Yo, I don't know which one of you niggaz left these rollerblades out here, but you need to get this shits out of the hall... Else you gonna be sittin down to skate cuz these mother fuckers gonna be up your ass."

164. Radar Brothers
"This Xmas Eve" 3:19
And the Surrounding Mountains
Los Angeles, CA

Homer and Paul snagged the same fish while out on the lake. The reeled it in together and, at age 64, shared their first ever homosexual kiss.

163. High Noon
"Gotta Lotta That" 2:40
What are You Waiting For?
Austin, TX

Sherm, a 3rd shift stock clerk at a grocery store, met Angelina, one of the city's top attorneys, online via Craigslist. After a few e-mails back and forth, they realized they were truly compatible and shared many of the same perspectives on numerous issues. According to the pics they sent to each other, they were attractive enough. Sherm took her out on a date, and this is where shit hit the fan. When Sherm pulled into Waffle House, Angelina questioned whether or not they had anything in common, and suspected he may even be a serial killer or registered sex offender.

162. Giddy Motors
"Whirled by Curses" 5:48
Make it Pop
London, England

Disgusting Don entered the cafeteria and immediately everybody in there panicked and raced out the door. Some were trampled in the mayhem.

161. Haemorrhage
"Virulent Mass Necropsy" 2:17
Morgue Sweet Home
Madrid, Spain

Barbara, the front office receptionist at the Chiropractic Clinic with the pleasant voice, in her spare time, only listened to Haemorrhage and declared everything else to be: "pussy shit."

160. Pedro the Lion
"Rehearsal" 3:49
Control
Seattle, WA

Andy could not wait until the day when he would have enough money saved up to afford a hit man. He figured he could get a discounted rate if bought in bulk, because there was quite a few people he needed rid of, in particular Christina- the bitch at Wendy's who spit on his food. Andy constructed a list of all those he planned on eliminating once he had the money and found the right bargain, sometimes contemplating if he could erase one or two off the list in order to save money. Maybe, he could do a couple of them himself and save a buck or two. It was a tough decision. Regardless, remodeling the dining room was going to have to wait until next summer.

159. L'Altra
"Afternoon Sun" 3:02
In the Afternoon
Chicago, IL

Once home from work, Marty and Denise would often lie in bed, put on some soft music, cuddle next to one another, and take a nice nap. Both cited this is their favorite thing about the other.
158. Cub Country
"Through My Window"  5:37
High Uinta High
New York, NY

Just before bed, Marie would often lie awake listening to music, envisioning the people from her office performing the songs. Not only did this put a smile on her face, but it gave her a new appreciation for her co-workers. Soon, she had developed an attraction to every single one of them. And shortly after that, she was fired for sexual harassment. Now, she lies awake listening to music, envisioning all of the people at the unemployment office performing the songs.

157. Citizen Bird
"Joy" 4:55
S/T
Gothenburg, Sweden

Mr. Douglas played music for his class while they took an exam. He took great pleasure in knowing that, A: There was no cheating. B: There was no talking during the exam. C: All of the students did significantly better than normal. D: All of the students seemed to be bobbing their heads in unison to the beat. E: Afterwards, all of his students were way cooler than Mr. Gardner's students, who hated music.

156. Hellacopters
"Carry Me Home"  3:44
By the Grace of God
Stockholm, Sweden

Phase 6 of being of diehard rock and roller (1968-present): Own a denim jacket with the sleeves cut off. There are several phases of Phase 6. Long hair on a balding head. Applying a patch to the jacket. Being over 40 and pursuing sexual intercourse with people in the 17-22 age group. This is but Phase 6, not to be confused with Phases 1-5, or Phases 7 through 29,746,803.

155. Badly Drawn Boy
"40 Days, 40 Fights" 3:55
Have You Fed the Fish?
Manchester, England

Finally deciding he was burnt out with staying home watching Scooby Doo cartoons, Doug actually left the house. By chance, he stumbled into one of the coolest bars in town. This was something that changed his life drastically, to the extreme he took all of his Scooby Doo boxer shorts to Goodwill, and showed at Carissa's house with his new boxer shorts. She was surpised to see him at her house, uninvited, and only knew him because she commented on his Scooby Doo boxer shorts. He stalked her for 40 days straight after that. Two valuable lessons were learned: Carissa finally realized that making implications about a man's personal life has potential inconveniences; Doug realized that 40 days of stalking a woman results in cyanide poisoning. And, Doug, sadly, passed away.

154. Doves
"There Goes the Fear" 6:54
The Last Broadcast
Manchester, England

Later that day, Carl looked at his 4 year old son Billy and thought to himself: "what a fucking disgrace to this family!"

153. Interpol
"NYC" 4:20
Turn On the Bright Lights
New York, NY


152. The Streets
"Stay Positive" 6:16
Original Pirate Material
Birmingham, England

Alan rode his bike through the neighborhood and realized shit had officially gone pear shaped. There was drama in every household.

151. Pleasure Club
"Roll Around" 5:22
Here Comes the Trick
Los Angeles, CA/New Orleans, LA

Ned brought Eliza over to his house hoping to get some. He put on some music because he heard music had an affect on women. Ned didn't know squat about music and just put it on some random Internet crap. This song came on, and yep, she was the type affected by music. Things were ok, but suddenly she bashed him over the head with his laptop and kicked over his table. She was fine again a little later. Ned said, "fuck it, let's just watch The Exorcist III."







Top Image by: ReactionFace
Bottom Image by: Rob Byrou

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