NC17 Top 125 Traxxx of 2002

The Top 200 Songs of 2002 + Making the Best of Bad Situations
Part 1: Petty Concerns
Part 2: Once Disgusted, Take Control
Part 3: Break-ups
Part 4: Go...Far... Believe in Yourself
Part 5: PBHD: Post Break-up Hope Disorder
Part 6: Various Causes and Effects of Fond Memories
Part 7: Unnatural States of Disillusionment
Part 8: The Beast

Part IV: Go...Far... Believe in Yourself

Press play to hear all of these songs in order.

There are times when you fall harder than ever. Sometimes, its not the crash from the descent that hurts... it's knowing that you jumped... and wherever it is you took that leap will never be the same.

125. Drums & Tuba
"Brain Liaters" 5:30
Mostly Ape
Austin, TX/New Orleans, LA

He tried to reflect back and think what it was he was doing back in those days. He came up with nothing. "Did I not exist?" So many moments had passed away in which nothing was accomplished. The other plots in which he had executed at the time probably seemed important then, but those matters were never discussed in the monthly Grand Scheme of Things board meeting.

124. Rjd2
"The Horror" 4:12
Eugene, OR

But he must of done something. Somewhere in the realms of a non-existence lifestyle to now, something had to have happened. "At which moment did I decide to withdrawal? Or, had I always be withdrawn, looking for a way inwards, into something else entirely? But how?"

123. Pretty Girls Make Graves
"Speakers Push the Air" 2:52
Good Health
Seattle, WA

How many days were wasted wishing for something else? Somewhere, out there, there had to have been that element of hope...the discovery that spawned the resurgence of youth.

122. The Mooney Suzuki
"Oh Sweet Susanna" 3:34
Electric Sweat
New York, NY

And so it was discovered, the life he longed for.;;his new friends...what he always hoped for. But the question on everyone else's minds: "who in the Hell is this nigger?" The question on his own mind: "have you always been here all along? Or have you ever even been here before? What year is it, in contrast to what year it was then?"

121. A-Frames
"Surveillance" 3:15
Seattle, WA

The gripping harsh reality plagued him. His friends, his family, his own wife no longer meant the same to him. Yet they recognized his changes, but couldn't figure it out. They monitored the situation closely, and seemed determined to prevent him from entering the world of actual existence; and keep him in their world of non-existence.

120. Brother JT
"Watcha Gonna Do?" 2:42
Maybe We Should Take Some More?
Easton, PA

The struggle of you want to do and what you have to do is the major dilemma. Do you have the courage to achieve greatness? The courage. The courage to abandon the world you were dragged into without request and strive for success in the new one- the one you've always wanted.

119. Monster Movie
"Waiting" 2:54
Last Night Something Happened
London, England

A plan had been devised to maybe bring those living in the non-existence world into the new world. It always seemed those plans would be converted, new developments would unfold, patterns that prevent existence. Therefore, existence, to them, is defined as a state of mind being stuck somewhere undesirable longing to be someplace else more fitting. That is what defines life.

118. Soundtrack of Our Lives
"I'm Still Aging" 3:53
Behind the Music
Goteborg, Sweden

The sense of growing old and missing out what you desire is a distressing cognizance. Once desperate to get out, to get somewhere else, people make drastic decisions, question everything around them, and ask themselves: "Is it worth it?" It wasn't worth it. Everything had to go.

117. Star of Ash
"Sanies" 7:03
Ilter Viator
Notodden, Norway

The pursuit of greatness and the ability to implement change takes far more than just courage alone. Proper funding is required. Often, it takes the guidance of another, for, great tasks are tough to conquer alone. He only had one of three, therefore had to overcome adversity all by himself, with no money whatsoever.

116. The Vines
"Outtathaway!" 3:03
Highly Evolved
Sydney, AU

The decision to no longer do anything inessential strictly for the sake of somebody else is a bold decision. And she said: "Friday, we have to do this." In which he replied: "No, sorry, I am doing this." Then spent potentially charitable moments from now until Friday resisting persuasions.

115. Mr. Lif
"Return of the B-Boy" 7:36
I Phantom
Boston, MA

Life continues under the microscope. Some people spend their lives dealing with close associates, colleagues, and family members perturbed with their actions because they sought to do something different other than what they desired/yet not angry themselves towards the aforementioned colleagues and associates with the fact that those other people seeking his/her acquaintance never compromised to do those things he/she found appealing. In many relationships, there is a keeper, and a prisoner. The prisoner periodically dares to escape.

114. Give Goods
"I Want to Kill a Rich Man" 4:28
I Want to Kill a Rich Man
Sydney, AU

Some people despise seeing another person fulfilling happiness by doing something in which they had previously warned him/her not to attempt. Some will even go so far as attempt to ruin others' happiness by interjecting past failures or stooping so low as to declare that the activity is "wrong". The ruiners have domain; plots to counter-attack ruiners are heroic.

113. 764-HERO
"Shoot a 45" 3:32
Nobody Knows This Is Everywhere
Seattle, WA

Many people fake illnesses to prevent their prisoners from enjoying life without them. Effective hypochondriacs are able to instill guilt on their prisoners and make promises that next week will be even better. Some hypochondriacs actually blame their prisoners for the perceived illness and make the prisoner think his/her desires to seek a better lifestyle is both hazardous and invalid.

112. Intercooler
"If You'd Seen" 4:44
Old School is the New School
Brisbane, AU

Prisoners often feel trapped and spend their time in solitude sulking the lifestyle that has been created for them. During these periods of solitude, the individual has to provide an inspiration to his/her self, because there is nobody else to ever confide. Thought patterns tend to range from bitter hatred to the current state of non-existence to pleasant dreams of success. The prisoner visualizes other people in the current world realizing the potential; and the achievements within the mind are unlimited. They tell themselves: "Go! Far! Believe in Yourself!" Because nobody else does. But, as long as they believe in themselves, there is always hope... and that hope keeps some people alive.

111. Cody ChesnuTT
"My Woman. My Guitars" 3:16
The Headphone Masterpiece
Atlanta, GA

Another tactic employed by stupid assholes, and stupid assholes only, is to belittle another person's dreams by stating they are either unrealistic, or claims the person lacks the ability to achieve them. Stupid assholes (which is the formal scientific detonation for these people) criticize the person for wishing for something out of the ordinary. The ideal candidate will assist a person in achieving what he/she defines as personal success--although, in some cases constructive criticism is necessary. The stupid asshole, on the other hand, does whatever it takes to ensure these ambitions are never realized.

110. Yeah Yeah Yeahs
"Machine" 3:19
Machine EP
New York, NY

There will eventually reach a time that a free-thinking individual will become so disgusted with the negativity towards the desire to be original, that he/she will unreservedly display a complete lack of interest in the keeper's lifestyle. One prisoner even went so far as to heckle the minister in the keeper's church. The prisoner will become defiant and adamantly refuse to participate in the events only important to the keeper, thus somewhat becoming a stupid asshole in retaliation.

109. Microwaves
"Police Biz" 2:15
System 2
Pittsburgh, PA

Once this form of tenacity has been reached, prisoners in relationships will often do things to purposely antagonize their perpetrators. Examples of this include: listening to loud abrasive music that will surely offend all conventional minded thinkers, sharing opinions out loud to allies that the jailer has deemed forbidden, openly masturbating to people who look nothing at all like the other person in the relationship.

108. Major Stars
"Hardly Mention" 5:59
Distant Effects
Cambridge, MA

Tension on the home front is most stressful, particularly when one doesn't have an ally; and especially in particular when everything else seems to be going wrong too. The escape seems impossible, but also inevitable. Irrational thoughts begin to seem logical. Examples include: suicide, heavy drug use, cheating on spouse with parent of the same sex...and purposely getting caught in the act.

107. Archer Prewitt
"I'm Coming Over" 3:30
Chicago, IL

84.2% of all waking hours are spent either trying to get out of the bad situation or attempting to make the best of it. Sometimes, people realize this. Once realized, they decide it is time to face reality, to confront all the issues plaguing them, and hopefully reach some sort of resolve. Or, one box of rat poison can solve a lot of things.

106. Beth Gibbons & Rustin Man
"Drake" 3:54
Out of Season
Bristol, England/London, England

The ability to empathize can be both a blessing and a curse. A curse: it can put one in awful situations for a prolonged period of time in order to prevent hurting someone else's feelings. Once it becomes fully realized that in order to escape, somebody has to get their feelings hurt...and you've made that decision to actually do it, then the decision to hurt another person ranks towards the top as the most emotionally draining feelings possible.

105. Racebannon
"Sober and Sad" 8:04
In the Grips of Light
Bloomington, IN

The intensity leading up to the moment of dissolution is strenuous. For, people supposedly can't just up and leave. But the decision has been made--the other just doesn't know about it, yet. It's like constantly waiting for that back-breaking moment when you can finally do it; while in the meantime questioning the decision when things seem to be temporarily smooth.

104. Black Dice
"Things Will Never Be the Same" 9:56
Beaches and Canyons
Providence, RI/New York, NY

The affects shall be permanent. Few people are able to completely abandon their imprisoned lifestyle in order to achieve their own version of happiness. Many will even feel guilty as if pursuing their own happiness is selfish; coupled with anger that others around them were permitted to achieve their version of happiness without regards.

103. Godspeed You Black Emperor!
"Motherfucker=Redeemer (Part 2)" 10:11
Yanqui U.X.O.
Montreal, QC  Canada

Once the escape has been made, the transition to the new world is not always easy. Sure there is a revival in the feeling of Independence, but the convenience factor and the routine is completely gone. It is comparable to the first day of school in the respect that you're not always sure where to go, and you encounter a few failures periodically.

102. Sunn O)))
"O))) Bow 2" 12:54
Flight of the Behemoth
Seattle, WA

For the first period, for the empathetic, despair is overwhelming. The sadness is mainly caused because the empathetic envisions the other person's sadness. And when the other person has already made a habit of making the escapee feel guilty about numerous other things, the guilt can be sickening, even nauseous. But thoughts of the non-existent past life are even more grotesque.

101. Acid Mothers Temple
"In E" 16:31
In C
Nagoya, Japan

Top Image by: The Brooklyn Paper
Bottom Image by: Kim Berry

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